There have been plenty of times when I’ve been disappointed with my body. I have ovarian insufficiency, meaning my body is unreliable at producing eggs and hormones. Most recently, I suffered a urinary tract infection over the weekend. Not much fun at all. I have some other vague and intermittent complaints that I wonder might be attributable to endometriosis (which might be an underlying factor in the ovarian insufficiency?). I’ll ask a doctor about that last issue soon.
And I don’t think i’ve ever been fit. That can’t be right, there must have been a length of time when I was a child that i was fit. I’m sure I jumped and climbed and skipped back then without thinking twice. But I was also a bookworm, with long periods of inactivity. And I was always the slowest and least skilled kid when it came to sports.
However, lately I’ve been trying to increase my fitness, and I’ve had a better mental attitude to being active too. In fact, I’ve been trying so much that I’m prone to being disappointed that progress is so slow. That’s why I really enjoyed noticing this concrete measure of improvement:
The black cotton singlet/tank top is just a cheap one that I bought a few years ago but it’s so comfortable that I practically lived in it the summer that I bought it. It has a racer-style back and is generously cut down below, so it doesn’t cling to your mid-section on a hot Australian day. The thing is, I didn’t wear it at all last summer. As you can tell, I have a small A-cup chest, and last summer I had a bloated belly that stuck out much further than that. I was convinced that, in this top especially, I looked about 6 months pregnant (or more on a bad day). It’s vain to be too concerned with this, I know, but there is also the odd situation of simultaneously being infertile and looking pregnant that I’d rather avoid.
I know that I’ve been slowly, slowly toning up all over, and reducing that belly. Sometimes a black and white difference really brings the message home though. This time it was ‘not wearing this super-comfy top during summer’ vs. ‘hooray! wearing the comfortable top and not worrying about buying something new to appease my vanity’. It also reminds me that the good work that i’ve been putting into my body for great reasons (not just vanity) is paying off. Slow and steady is winning the race and I couldn’t be happier with that.